A very good place to start

It was all so romantic at the start, a hot summer day, a kitten in a box, and a cab running over my foot. I started out on one island just south of Manhattan, we'll call it Staten. After hurriedly cleaning the place up for my subletter and shoving my newly adopted kitten, Little, into her carrier I hop out to the street to catch the cab that I've called to come pick me up and take me to the 2pm ferry, the first step in a long journey and the start of my summer. Excitement isn't even the word to describe the bubbling in my chest. I've never lived in a vacation island for the summer. I've never been completely surrounded by affluent and wealthy homosexuals. I've never seen a beautiful ocean wave crest and fall only to reveal an empty lube packet among the conches (I now have...). It's bound to be an amazing time. Right?

Let me fill in the back story. I'm a 20-something gay guy. I live in NYC and have done so for about 8 years after moving here from southern Ohio. After graduating from school for performing arts I've been mildly successful but an offer came for the summer to work in The Pines of Fire Island (gay mecca essentially) and I took it. Will it further my career? I dunno. Will it make me a better person? Decidedly not. Will it be worth reading about my mishaps, stumbles, adventures, regrets, fears, drunkeness? Meh. We'll see.

So, I'm standing outside of my apartment complex with two suitcases, a backpack, and a kitten in a box all jittery and ready for adventure. The cab that I've called is on its way... right? Did I call the wrong number... Hmm. Let me just look.... nope. Okay.... So it's 1:50pm and as long as he gets here now I'll make that boat.

1:56pm. Kitten already hates me for putting her through the first 12 minutes of this soon to be 5 hour trip. I hate the cab man. Why is it so hot? And I can't even... SHUT UP KITTEN! Grr.....

2:10pm. Hey cab man. How's it going? Me? I'm great dude... just great. I'm also an hour behind now because you're 10 minutes late. And that's fine. Kitten hates me now. That's also fine I suppose. Let's just go.

2:13 pm. Oh. Great. A Five Borough bike race. Fun. What cab man? You can't drive me to the boat because of the bikers... and I've gotta walk downhill with bags and kitten alone in this damnable heat... well I'll just have to then. Okay.

2:14pm. DAMNIT! Cab man why did you run over my foot while I was trying to reclaim kitten from your backseat? What's that? You swear you heard the door close? Interesting... really interesting... I swear I had 5 toes just a minute ago...

So, after a perfect start, I finally arrive at the Staten Island ferry. A man who doesn't speak any English sees the distress wearing on me and just picks up one of my bags. Are you stealing from me sir? No. Just helping. Ah... kindness. Blessed blessed kindness. He walks with me all the way to the seat that I've chosen, mumbling something about the dogs that sniff your luggage in the terminal and the possession of marijuana, something I'd never agree to on a public blog. I ride on the boat receiving mothers and children warmly as they ogle kitten, who is starting to shed from fear and loathing. I'm pretty sure she intends on killing me in my sleep and at this point I would welcome that.

Once we've docked and I've collected the fallen fur from both her head and mine I disembark, renewed and refreshed by the waves and fresh air. Disregarding the state of my bank account, I flag down a cabbie, stuff my junk in the trunk and give him the directions.

Penn station would be a madhouse with a tour guide and no luggage. For those who've never been there, it's underground, not that well lit, and full of people who're dying to both be the hell away from here and totally drunk. So, I buy my ticket and walk directly to the nearest watering hole and settle up close to the door because I've only got 14 minutes to get my summer buzz started. I've done more damage in less time before so I'm not too concerned.

While waiting for the bartender to come back from her smoke break a charming woman starts doting on what she refers to as my "baby." At this point kitty is dying for some attention and I'm just dying. I open the case, beg her to pet Little and ask her not to steal anything while I order myself a drink. My frustration begins to dissipate when her boyfriend walks up and say, "Can I grab you two something to drink?" Margarita. Rocks. Salt. Please. Thanks. And I give him a twenty to cover it which he refuses saying that my kitten is bringing his gal joy, so i deserve a drink. I think that's fair and gladly re-pocket the cash while girlfriend and I talk about a former Siamese she had recently lost and kitten has a fallen in love with girlfriend's hand.

Boyfriend returns with my drink, which I pound because we've got 5 minutes to make it. These two happen to be riding the same train that I am out to Long Island and Boy carries a bag while Girl carries the kitty (insert tasteless P-word joke here). We settle in, an old man hits on girlfriend while I wrestle my luggage into an over head compartment and we're on our way.

Sadly, Boy and Girl live not too far out on the island and soon I'm left alone with kitty who is infinitely calmer thanks to Girlfriend. I close the old eyelids, kick back and relax. I arrive in Sayville, Long Island around 6pm (which you'll recall is 4 hours later than this rambling story started). I'm driven to a dock and my restaurant owner picks me up in a boat. His boat. So cool. We make our way out to the pines and all I can say for those who've never been there is beautiful. Beautiful. Beauty-full.

After docking Kitten has become the fan favorite with the handful of homos that pass by. Even office manager lady loves her and offers to hold her for a while to let me settle in. More kindness. I welcome it. The walk to my accommodations is along a wooden planked path lined by tall colorful trees, 30 foot bamboo stalks, and brilliant, gorgeous, stunning beach homes. I've already taken 20 pics on my phone and while they upload to facebook I round the corner to my place for the summer.

It's called the Ranch... Essentially it's a double wide trailer where two boys stay in a room and a bathroom joins to another room of two boys. I've chosen to come out a few days early and settle in, have my choice of both room and bunk, etc. After dropping off the bag and checking out the 'sitch' I look around and thank whatever power that be has gotten me here alive, safe, and given me this incredible summer.

The rest is a bit of a blur because there was a drink in my hand within 5 minutes. Seriously. Grey Goose and soda. I love gay people. Love them.

Cocktail at my side I go to re-collect kitten to find that she's smitten even more homos. I'm convinced that she's gonna find me a man this summer. And that's why I keep her around. After getting her situated with a pooping box and some food I do a little light unpacking. I do a quick wardrobe change, toss my locks up into my new favorite hairstyle, the Samurai Knot, and drunkenly hit the path to The Pines' premier B and B: The Madison. It's owned by the same people who own our restaurant and they "keep the troops fed." I walk in to receive another beverage and steaks on the grill. (I silently re-thank the powers that be).

Dinner: incredible. Sobriety: thing of the past. Hot tub: in it. Life: amazing.

Needless to say I'm pleased. I don't know what this summer has in store for me. I've already started falling for someone here, and who knows where that will lead. I've already been told to stay away from drugs this summer. However, apparently no one considers pot and coke a part of the drug family... interesting. I've already gotten drunk and been in my undies in front of strangers... Perfect. I intend to wake up each day and live the best day I can no matter what. So far I've been successful. Let's hope it stays that way.